This week’s list:
Ten Five Actors(ish) I’d Want to Cryogenically Preserve to Keep Them From Getting Old and Yucky Looking
On top of a functioning cryogenic theory, I’m also going to need a time machine to accomplish this, as well as a llllotttttttt of money. Apparently, this type of procedure can run between $90000 and $150000. Here we go, in no specific order.
5. Humphrey Bogart
No justification needed. Just look at him. Now, say it with me: “I remember every detail. The Germans wore gray, you wore blue.”
4. Ryan O’Neal
See how cryogenics would have come in handy here for the once handsome star of Love Story and What’s Up Doc?
I’d apologize, but love means never having to say you’re sorry.
3. Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston’s marriage
It was the most beautiful match ever.
At least until this happened.
2. Marlon Brando
Most people think of Brando and The Godfather…. or Brando in Streetcar Named Desire (worst movie ever, btw, except for the random ‘STELLA’s.) But I’ll always prefer this one, the crooning Sky Masterson and all the thugs with ridiculously perfect enunciation. I would put in a picture of him when he was old, but it’s far too depressing.
1. Harrison Ford
Quick, freeze him in carbonite again before his face melts anymore! Sad, sad.
That was more depressing than I anticipated. Here, go cheer up:
A crazy slide
A slideshow of puppy cuteness
A whimsical umbrella
A nerdy remake